My mama-mia's eyes were one of a kind.
She loved to reminiscence and remind me of old stories, always first asking-
“Bee-Marie do you remember…”- She had nicknames for all of us children, little sweet rhymes or inside stories that were little anecdote treasures gifted from her to us.
She would continue- “Remember how you would just stare at me? As a baby, your eyes were full of curiosity. Your big blue eyes would only look right into mine, and wouldn’t look away.” She laughed, and said “There was so much going around you. But when I held you, you were SO quiet, I felt like we were in our own bubble, and you just wouldn’t stop staring at me!”
I already know why I wouldn’t look away in my earliest days of life. The reason is simple, my mom was the most beautiful woman, and I knew even then I wanted to be just like her.
She would say soon after, that my eyes reminded her of Bette Davis' eyes, and would hum or sing that song as she would compliment me (the song ‘Bette Davis Eyes’ by Kim Carnes).
Her hair is Harlow gold
Her lips a sweet surprise
Her hands are never cold
She's got Bette Davis eyes
She'll turn her music on you
You won't have to think twice
She's pure as New York snow
She got Bette Davis eyes
I know why I stared at her so much. Even through elementary school, middle school, and highschool and as an adult, I always stopped in awe to stare at her. I loved to think my eyes were like her eyes. Not so much in their shape and color, for she had beautiful almond eyes, swimming in deep forest brown with flecks of gold. But looking deeper, she had that spark of excitement, liveliness, spontaneity, creativity, and kindness which I wished to find in my own.
When I close my eyes now, Mye, I can still see your gorgeous face, because I memorized every detail over the years, and I’m still looking into your eyes. And I see what I see and feel what I did all those years ago. Utterly and completely LOVED.
And that is why I couldn’t ever look away.